We didn’t do much in the way of advertising Roby’s arrival anywhere apart from in person and this blog. Because of that there are a number of people, people I really quite like and count myself as quite close to, who had no idea I became a dad last week, and Abby, a mother. 

It’s a curious cutting against the grain of what social media has made of our increasingly digital friendships. I believe we expect to be abreast of things, but somehow, when we aren’t, as in the case of being surprised that your friend is a dad, it’s actually a nice feeling, and a novel one, too. 

Social media abhors a surprise brought on by anyone but itself. Slavoj Zizek suggested that we’ve horseshoed our way from the ancient days of arranged marriages and matchmakers, through the modernist miracle of spontaneous romance, and back into algorithmically dictated romance. This is bad he says, and I agree with him. Social media has made every social relationship a thing mediated by a matchmaker.

At least in the middle ages you could get to know your buddies without judging the tone of their every socially relevant comment, outburst, or opinion. 

I’ve actually had a twinge of guilt for having not made some post about Israel/Palestine. Am I shit person for not weighing in? Am I weak for not putting myself out there? That is ridiculous, obviously. What on Earth could I possibly contribute to this asinine slap-fight between white people trying to look holier than eachother? I don’t particularly care to look holier than anybody, at least I aspire not to. 

Pride comes before the fall and all that.