I’m writing this on my way to the 1st birthday party of a friend’s child. It’s whale themed.

I don’t own anything with a whale on it, or at least, I didn’t until about twenty minutes ago. Roby has a shirt with a whale on it, very cute, and Abby has a pair of shorts with fish on them, also very cute, and close enough.

To show up to this party without losing face, I had Abby paint a whale and the words “MOBY DICK” on to a grubby old tee shirt of mine covered in sweat and oil stains. Now it is perfect.

One of my favorite artifacts is a shirt from “The Museum of Everyday Objects.”

They have a gift shop full of post cards and sometimes candles. It’s a self-service gift shop with a moneybag and requests not to steal.  There’s a price list and on it it indicates that they sell t-shirts for the price of “all the money in your wallet.”

I had seen the promise of that gift shop item for years before one finally appeared and it FAR surpassed any hopes I might’ve had for this relic.

It was not some cute little silk-screen printed illustration, or an embroidery, or anything boring and corporate like that, oh no.

It was a kids size anonymous navy blue t-shirt advertising some local soccer team, all of the branding having been crossed out with pink houseplant. Beneath that a tilted MEO is written, and on the back, huge and at something like a 30 degree angle, the full title done with a full sized house-painting brush - THE MUSEUM OF EVERY DAY LIFE.

I got it for Abby, but she doesn’t like it because she’s insane, and it’s also a little small.

Maybe if I have money some day I’ll get it framed.

It’s incredible.

The Moby Dick shirt that Abby made me this morning captures some of the magic of that museum shirt.

I’m quite confident that by the end of the summer none of my white shirts will remain white. They’ll advertise favorite novels and films in crooked handwriting painted with the same blue as my house.